“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” ~ Maya Angelou

I am many things and I have many stories. So many stories.

I process life through writing. I always have. From the time I learned to form words with my crayons, around the age of four, I have embraced pages, both written and blank.

The written pages (my four year old self would sound out words from newspapers, marveling at the feel of them in my mouth) fed my mind and taught me far more than any school classroom ever did. The blank pages were the home of my soul’s expression, and remain so to this day.

Journaling is so much a part of me, that for the longest time, I’m talking decades, I believed I existed only on paper.

• Writing helped me through the lonely and confusing hours of my childhood when the boundaries of love were violated and my child mind was unable to make sense of what was happening…

• Writing helped me process a violent sexual attack in my very early 20s where my shattered psyche moved immediately into denial…

• Writing helped me make sense of life after a complete breakdown in my 30s when I was finally forced to revisit the past and discover who I really was and who I wanted to be…

• Writing restored my sense of “self” and helped me reach out to other women, helping them tell their own stories in circles of safety…

• Writing has been my companion through chronic illness and surgery, providing solace and ways of reframing my physical pain…

What I Do…

I don’t call myself a coach, that is not what I am. Nor am I a therapist. The word I’ve used is mentor, but only because people are so hung up on labels.

I’m a mentor for women who are living with trauma, whatever the source, including childhood trauma, sexual violence, grief and loss.

I help them regulate their nervous systems – deal with anxiety, sleep problems, panic attacks – so that they can work on the reframing of their lives and the stories they’ve told themselves and move forward with deeper understanding, compassion and self love.

The women who find their way to me have usually tried a lot of things. They’ve been through cognitive therapy, they’ve seen the psychiatrists, taken the drugs, sat on couches and choked out their stories on countless afternoons, staring at a point just passed the therapists’, yes more than one, head.

They’ve spoken about their dreams and nightmares, their relationships, their job, their kids, and answered the inevitable “how does that make you feel?” with one of a dozen overused words – sad, scared, hopeless, frustrated, angry, afraid…

For a while they were convinced that they were okay. They were “over it”. But there’s always been something missing, some disconnect.

What many people still don’t understand, is that trauma is an all encompassing experience. It’s not only about what’s happening in your mind, it’s a full body experience, and the body holds on to trauma until we learn to recognise it and find ways to release it.

This is why we often find that trauma responses:
either continue long after you’ve completed the traditional therapy process, or they’re reactivated later in life, long after you think you’re “over it”.

For a number of reasons, trauma responses often resurface during those stages of life when we are experiencing hormonal and/or life changes.

What I offer goes way beyond talking and mindset work.

The approach I take in my work is to help women to understand trauma responses, and how they are stored in the body. I bring together somatic work with breathwork, mindfulness, meditation and journaling, always from a trauma informed place, to work through anxiety, boundaries, worthiness, grief, vulnerability and courage.

I believe that healing is possible through our connection with others. We need someone to walk alongside us, to listen, to guide; someone who understands when we stumble, who’s walked the walk. I’ve been there. I know…

At the end of the day, we’re all responsible for our own healing, and we need to make that decision every day.

There’s a lot to be said about the old clichés:

• One day at a time
• Keep it simple
• Live life on life’s terms
• Today we have a choice

I could go on, but you get the point.

Healing from trauma is the same. Each day you get up and you show up. It’s not easy. It’s a tough road to walk, but it’s transformational.

Healing is a process, we need to respect the process.

If you’d like to explore more, you’re welcome to join my private Facebook group: Women in the Arena, Daring to Heal

Alternately, feel free to contact me directly.